How to Develop Peace of Mind
A person can develop peace of mind when they know they are reasonable, honest and have good intentions but at the same time; they set their boundaries and do not allow others to take advantage of them.
A person can develop peace of mind if they are willing to discuss their differences in a peaceful, respectful, civil manner but at the same time refuse to entertain ultimatums and other bossy, entitled attitudes.
If a person just wants to remain disrespectful and have bossy, entitled attitudes then it is NOT reasonable to try to help them understand helpful thoughts and helpful behaviors because they are not ready or willing to listen and understand. You will just be wasting your precious time and energy.
You can also get physically sick by trying to help unreasonable, disrespectful people understand what is reasonable when THEY think THEY know everything and do not have respect for YOUR thoughts, experiences or accomplishments.
I developed seizures from this so in my case it is very obvious I cannot associate with people like this. Others many get headaches and suffer other ailments.
So just let them know you will be willing to have a respectful discussion but until they are ready, you wish them the best in their own life.
***Then you can go on with your positive agenda, with positive people and have peace of mind that you communicated your reasonable thoughts and left the door open for when they want to be reasonable; IF THEY EVER CHOOSE WITH THEIR OWN FREE WILL.
This works for me so I hope it works for you too.
***We can only control what WE choose to do; NOT WHAT OTHERS CHOOSE TO DO.
So if people want to be unreasonable and disrespectful; a wise person will CHOOSE not associate with them because they will only bring you problems and destroy your values and peace of mind.
There is a particular person who refuses to stop hacking my computer and sending me Trojan messages. I have told him and his bosses many times and they all know it is illegal too but; they don’t care. All these people claim to be “religious” so you know they are all liars and sick because religious, caring people do not behave this way and I am not the only one whose computer is hacked either. It appears his bosses pay him to do this to harass others and he is sick because he CHOOSES to go along.
He ALLOWS himself to be used as their pawn; just like many alienated children ALLOW the sick, alienating father(mother) and others helping him, use them.
***We are NOT PROPERTY so stand up for your rights and get away from them.
If you are reasonable, you would never want to become friendly with someone who thinks it is cool or acceptable to hack computers or get involved with a group who promotes this.
Plus, as many experts have shown, most likely this is not the only illegal thing this person does and his bosses pay him to do.
So just use common sense and stay away from people like this. Expect them to lie and make up stories and do other harmful things.
To determine a person’s character: look at their ACTIONS, not just their words. Also, look below the surface.
***Sometimes our precious children of all ages have to fall and harm themselves before they will become reasonable. For example, a reasonable person knows that motorcycles are very dangerous.
It is not cool to ride them, especially without a helmet and other protection because when you fall, you can get very hurt especially if you get hit by a car or the motorcycle falls on top of you.
I know someone’s whose son not only insisted on riding a motorcycle but then got in with a bad crowd and started to do drugs and adapted other very harmful, unreasonable irrational habits.
***Her son was very smart but he refused to be reasonable.
My friend tried to help her son understand how he was doing very harmful things. However, her smart but unreasonable son refused to listen.
Her smart but unreasonable son stopped communicating with her because he did not want to FACE THE TRUTH and get help to understand and resolve the root of his problem; why he insisted on doing harmful things to himself.
***He had a lot of pain inside that his divorced father had caused but; he did not want to address these issues.
***This son kept PUNISHING HIMSELF believing the lies his sick, alienating father told him and that it was his fault many things happened and that he was not capable and needed to listen and be controlled by the sick father- all lies and typical acts of Parental Alienation as many of us know.
THIS SON WAS VERY CAPABLE AND NOT TO BLAME FOR ANYTHING; IT WAS THE SICK, ALIENATING FATHER WHO INTENTIONALLY CAUSED THESE PROBLEMS.
Anyway, my friend heard from her son years later when he was dying in the hospital because he was in a motorcycle accident.
Only then was he finally willing to listen and become reasonable.
***She helped him recover and begin his life again as a reasonable person but he had to almost die before he was willing to be reasonable, change his destructive ways and use his smart mind.
Also, note, when people do unreasonable things like this, usually their emotional maturity ends so they act the age they were when they started to become unreasonable. This is why many people act like a teen or young adult even though they are much older.
***They stopped their emotional maturity by doing unreasonable acts.
***All during this time, my friend was able to have peace of mind because she knew she tried to help her son but; she held strong to her own morals and values and refused to allow him or anyone else to change her reasonable, morals ways.
This is what a leader does.
She eventually helped all of her children understand the horrible lies and schemes their divorced father told them and used them for and helped them become reasonable again; like they were before the divorce and before the parental alienation began.
***So, like my friend; hold strong to your reasonable and morals and have peace of mind and be proud of yourself for doing this too.
There are many great things to do in Los Angeles and elsewhere with many reasonable, fun people so that is how I choose to spend my time and energy with my peace of mind. So, just do the same in your area and you will feel great too and appreciate your strength and what you are doing.
Never feel badly for telling unreasonable people you cannot associate with them until they are reasonable, respectful, honest and civil.
***Don’t sacrifice you own good standards. Set the example for others to follow your reasonable standards so they too can have peace of mind; IF THEY CHOOSE.
-By Sara Hassman, Parental Alienation Solutions, Founder; www.PAlienation.org