Self-hatred and Obsessions and Harming Yourself are Connected
Self-hatred is why some people seem lazy or refused to participate in fun activities, projects or many things.
They are deep down AFRAID people will criticize them, make fun of them and make them feel sad and they can’t face any more criticism or sadness.
This is especially true for alienated Children of all ages because their sick, alienating parent and those helping him are disrespectful to you and criticizes and manipulates you all the time.
This is what sick, alienating parents and those who go along with them do so know to expect them to behave this way; they are evil and sick.
I know from my own experiences with my ex-husband MARK F. HASSMAN, which is well documented, when I developed seizures due to his disrespectful, demeaning, manipulative behavior; (not kind, compassionate and reasonable behavior as he had for about 20 years); he tried to make me believe my reasonable thoughts were wrong and his manipulative ideas were right.
He would not leave me alone and just tried to WEAR ME DOWN trying to get me to do what he wanted which was to sign student loans knowing that we had millions of dollars saved specifically for our Children’s educations.
He also refused to account for the millions we had saved like it just disappeared while he bought for HIMSELF an expensive racing bike for about $3,000 because he was going to start taking off work and traveling to bike races with his Executive friends but told me I had to sign student loans and work.
Well, I reasonably refused and he just continued to become more and more belligerent and abusive trying to wear me down so I would sign the student loans.
I became more and more sick until I got out of this abusive environment and separated from him and my Children who were forced to imitate him and treat me, ALL OF A SUDDEN, with disrespect by cussing and saying horrible things to me, their own Mother who is known for her kindness, love, good character and values. (which is also well documented).
***My Children would never behave with disrespect towards their own Mother unless they were being forced and manipulated.
They know we discussed things and worked things out and that respect, kindness and helping each other was part of our daily lives since the day they were born.
My goal as their full time caregiver was always to help them learn important lessons so they became happy, kind, honesty people using their special skills to HONESTLY HELP THEMSELVES and others; not manipulating and lying to THEMSELF developing self-hatred and obsessions and trying to harm themself.
It is so sad and pathetic; to this day; my Children refuse to have a respectful, civil conversation with me because their father won’t allow this and my ex-husband MARK F. HASSMAN, their father refuses to rectify our fraudulent divorce with millions of dollars of concealed community assets as many public records and public hearings show.
Instead of my ex-husband MARK F. HASSMAN being reasonable; I have a hearing coming up because he alleged I contacted business people to try to gather the information TO RECTIFY OUR FRAUDULENT DIVORCE saying I am harassing THEM.
Why do you think he does not want me to rectify our fraudulent divorce? So he and those helping him can keep MY assets that should have been distributed to me?
Remember my ex-husband MARK F. HASSMAN is a Chief Financial Officer “with more than 25 years of executive and entrepreneurial experience in finance, accounting and general management,” who “earned his MBA degree from Harvard Business School” and is referred to as a “Principal” as the Company website where he worked for many years stated. He also stated on his linkedin summary that he “Spearheaded” the Jiffy Lube International, Inc, 1984-1987 successful IPO (initial public offering).
***As other records show, he FINANCIALLY PLANNED for our divorce and concealed millions of dollars of community assets with the help of those in his “CHAIN OF FOOLS.” Many are aware of this too.
Think anyone from his “CHAIN OF FOOLS” will try to help me rectify these unlawful acts or continue to believe they will get away with all this corruption; including continuing to manipulate the minds of my wonderful children so our beautiful companionships we enjoyed remains destroyed because they are AFRAID to contact me.
***I know my Children and millions like them are REASONABLE, and would want to contact their loving Mother (father) and work things out in a reasonable, respectful, loving manner; if they did not feel threatened.
I know my daughter would love to have a car as would her younger brother and would want many basic necessities they have been deprived of including LOVE from their Mother. They are very SMART, REASONABLE people!!!
My Children and millions like them just have to know not to allow yourself to listen to the lies and manipulations of your alienating father (mother) and those helping him; so you will not feel any self-hatred.
Instead, for my Children and millions like them;
Don’t believe it!!!
So, don’t be afraid to associate with other kind, respectful people and do worthwhile things.
Please don’t think you do not DESERVE to be happy and PUNISH yourself by doing destructive things like drugs, drinking, eating poorly, cutting yourself or manipulating others because you have lost hope and believe that you should hate yourself. This is not true.
Please don’t think this way!!!
Also, some view their obsessions as an ESCAPE from their problems. Instead, be STRONG and get HELP to figure out the root of your problem so you can change instead of escaping by doing harmful things. Contact your loving Mother because everyone can use more love, kindness and respect in their life.
***Understanding the root of your unhappiness or why you feel you need to do harmful things to yourself and maybe others is REASONABLE. Continuing to be unhappy and continuing to do harmful things is not reasonable. Remember, the divorce and the parental alienation is NOT YOUR FAULT at all.
It is so pathetic and horrible how the alienating parent will not allow the children to reunite with their loving Mother (father).
For example, my ex-husband MARK F. HASSMAN has negotiated multi-million dollar agreements in his career and if he wanted to, he could easily use his skills to help reunite me with my Children.
Instead he does the opposite and discourages them from having anything to do with me as many emails and other documents clearly show.
He denies this but THE DOCUMENTS SPEAK FOR THEMSELVES AND SO DO HIS ACTIONS. It is truly very sad and pathetic that my ex-husband MARK F. HASSMAN is so horrible to destroy the beautiful companionships I enjoyed with my Children as many emails and other information clearly show and has been documented by professionals too.
So, I hope my Children and millions of others know how capable they are and don’t believe the lies trying to make them think otherwise. Sometimes a challenging situation like parental alienation can help you learn important lessons that you may not have learned otherwise. Don’t worry; remember your loving Mother (father) is there for you.
It is important to have healthy discipline in all areas of our life.
For example, it is important to take good care of yourself by exercising and eating right on a regular basis even if sometimes you do not feel like it.
It is also important to get out and do things you enjoy on a regular basis too.
It is also important to associate with people who treat you with kindness and encourage your POSITIVE, INDEPENDENT, CREATIVE thoughts.
***Don’t believe an alienating, controlling Father (mother) who tries to make you unhappy or makes you feel like you are incapable.
This is just their STRATEGY to make you feel insecure so they can CONTROL you more. Know how capable you are and think back to when your loving Mother (father) was part of your life and all the accomplishments you made and the fun times you had together.
Part of being an adult is to learn from your mistakes and “begin again” as a wiser person.
This is maturity.
Don’t give up and don’t alienate your loving Mother (father) who has good values and character. Just discuss your disagreements and work through them in a civil, reasonable manner without ultimatums. Ultimatums are not reasonable and are what controlling, dictators use.
***A good friend of mine sent me this message today: “Don’t wait for the perfect moment, take the moment and make it perfect.”
So, know how capable you are and please get rid of any thoughts of self-hatred or that you do not deserve to be happy.
You also deserve to be treated with kindness and respect and I hope if someone does not treat you with kindness and respect you demand that they do. If they refuse, then get away from them because treating someone unkindly and with disrespect is abuse and emotional torture.
Stand up for your Rights and Surround yourself with those who are kind, respectful and do positive things so you can be enriched and enrich them too.
Then you will feel special, kindness and love; not self-hatred.
-By Sara Hassman, Parental Alienation Solutions, Founder; www.PAlienation.org