When you start to make Positive Changes
When you start to make positive changes by thinking and then doing new positive things and associating with new positive people it is important to make this a habit. You cannot do it once or twice or when you feel like it. You have to make the positive changes part of your LIFESTYLE. For example, if you want to get in shape or if you are in shape want to keep yourself in shape and also help relieve tension; you have to exercise daily or almost daily. You cannot do it once or twice a week and see PROGRESS. It is something you do daily or almost daily so it becomes part of your routine.
***Also, you cannot take shortcuts like using diet pills or crash diets or other gimmicks. You have to take the time to exercise and eat right, do things with positive people. BEING WITH POSITIVE PEOPLE WHO ARE KIND WILL MOTIVATE YOU. You will have a new sense of PURPOSE and this is sustainable. The gimmicks are not sustainable and will often make you sick too.
FORMULA FOR SUCCESS: Just be REASONABLE and exercise, eat right, think and do positive things and BE WITH kind, honest reasonable people and get those who are not OUT of your life. No excuses because they will only hold you back; often on purpose too.
President Obama recently spoke at Northwestern University and said that many leaders will come from Universities like Northwestern. Well, that may be true but if you also look at people who have made many positive changes for millions in the world; they did not even have college degrees. They enriched themselves with books and other resources and DID many activities so they were forced to make CHOICES in life which taught them important lessons.
Many Universities today do not have programs that will help students learn important philosophies, financial management, collaboration and other skills needed to become a well balanced, happy person in life. I know my youngest son dropped out of college this year, as my ex-husband said at a public hearing.
So, for my Son and those like him; I understand if you don’t want to take on all those student loans that you will spend years trying to pay back not knowing if you will have a stable job.
Also, if like my son you can’t rely on your parents because I was deprived of receiving millions of dollars from the divorce which I would use to help. And his father, my ex-husband swore in several public hearings and on documents he is “insolvent.”
He did make millions and currently can afford many luxuries as public records have shown; but swears he is “insolvent” and had my spousal support eliminated by his expensive Newport Beach law firm representing him; as he drove to court in his paid off Lexus and vacations too; but he is “insolvent.”
So, for alienated Children in similar situations like my Son; please enrich yourself and know that it is a person’s POSITIVE ATTITUDE, GOOD MORALS and BEING REASONABLE that determines whether a person will have peace of mind, be happy and do good things.
Money, to me does not measure success because as we all know; many with money are dishonest, manipulating, controlling people and also very miserable and try to make others miserable too; JUST LIKE THEM.
Even those who try to hide money like my ex-husband are miserable.
Along with hiding money he has hidden community assets that belong to me as the public hearing on June 11, 2014 showed many examples of hidden assets like Trusts etc.
My ex-husband is a CPA and knows the definition of being “insolvent.” I guess he is trying to change it to mean when he “assigns” community property to “religious” institutions using 501(c)(3) agreements and Vow of Poverty and those types of “charitable” agreements.
Didn’t you get the memo?
***It’s called how to cheat your ex-wife and your wonderful children and try to control them or destroy them.
Many Jewish Organizations can tell you all about this plan so STAY AWAY FROM THEM, especially Sinai Temple in Los Angeles, Rabbi David Wolpe and Howard Lesner, the Executive Director.
***Do not give them any money or send money on line to someone trying to get you to give.
These organizations have all kinds of schemes and aliases.
Charity starts at home so keep your money for yourself during these uncertain times and donate your time instead if you want to. Just keep doing good things for yourself.
You do not want to be part of a group like those like my ex-husband and those “religious” organizations because this is not reasonable and is very immoral and evil.
So, just become the person YOU WANT TO BE. Then when you are ready to get the credits you need to graduate; you can take the classes YOU want that will be HELPFUL to you and you won’t need student loans since you have been working.
***This is VERY SMART and I COMMEND MY SON for thinking of this and then deciding to DO it. So keep going. I know, as your loving Mother, you will do great things as will others just like him. Also, don’t worry about me and we will also be able to renew our relationship very easily when you feel comfortable; the same goes for your sister and brother and other alienated Children.
Know that when you are ready; you will easily be able to renew your relationship with your loving Mother (father) because they are reasonable, empathic and also understand the emotional torture and brainwashing involved in parental alienation or whatever you would like to call this sudden destruction of the Mother/ Child bond around the time of the divorce.
So be friendly to people, not allowing others to be disrespectful to you, eat well and take good care of YOURSELF by thinking and learning positive things and DOING positive things including keeping your body in shape and going to your doctors and dentist appointments regularly.
Making these changes are an part of your new lifestyle and just do them until they are part of your routine and then you won’t even have to think about making time for them anymore or putting up with people who are controlling and disrespectful. You will do it AUTOMATICALLY. ***You will have a new positive routine without these old negative habits and negative, controlling people.
Don’t make excuses either. If there is a will there is a way and our choices define our character.
***You only have yourself to blame for your choices; no one else because YOU have free will to choose how YOU want to behave, the people YOU want to be with and those you don’t, and the things YOU want to do and the things you do not want to do.
Remember, you can’t just hope or hope and pray and reasonably expect that you will change. You have to think positive new thoughts and DO positive new things all the time. Not sometimes.
Also, when you start to realize the truth and realize some of the things you did that you are ashamed of; you may get a headache and just not feel so good.
Don’t worry because this is good.
You are releasing all the shame from your subconscious and realizing the truth so you understand why you behaved a certain way. Maybe you wanted others to feel your pain; maybe you allowed someone to force or threaten you.
You can’t undo the past but you can begin again with the new truthful and positive thoughts and behaviors you have learned. This is how adults mature and become wise. Also, those that you hurt, just apologize, show them you are sincere and begin a new relationship with them. Most people will understand; especially your loving Mother. (father). ***Give yourself a chance to have a new relationship with her. I am sure you will be very happy you did.
***Anyone who does not want you to try to reunite with your loving Mother (father) is unreasonable and has some secret, ulterior motive that is very negative and hurtful.*** So, choose to adopt your own ideology and do what YOU want to do that is reasonable. Doing what an unreasonable alienating parent wants does not make sense and will only stop you from reaching your beautiful potential and having peace of mind and finding happiness. Our choices determine the type of life we will have.
Will you choose to be proud of YOURSELF or ashamed causing you to suffer and have pain that lingers for years until you decide to stop making unreasonably choices that not only harm yourself but also harm others? You only need to be proud of YOURSELF. Don’t concern yourself with those who tell lies about you or try to control you. THIS IS THEIR PROBLEM and THEY CHOSE to do these things. You have free will and do not have to CHOOSE to do what they did.
Instead choose to do what is reasonable, moral, honest and kind.
So choose to be proud of yourself and make the changes needed so you will be proud and happy for YOURSELF and lead the way for others to follow you and be proud and happy too. You can do it if you really want to because I know how capable you are as are millions of alienated children of all ages who have intentionally been made to feel insecure. Don’t believe it. Know how capable you are; I do.
-By Sara Hassman, Parental Alienation Solutions, Founder, www.PAlienation.org