Why are some people depressed even though they have many material things, a great career and what appears to be friends?
Some people are depressed even though they have all the material things they want, a professional career and what they consider friends. (even though many would sell their “friends” down the river if that suited their own interests).
These things they have and their accomplishments are meaningless to them because they lack the APPROVAL of their sick, narcissistic, sociopathic controlling father because:
1- he keeps putting more and more unreasonable demands upon them so he can keep them under his control forever;
2- or he died before they could please him so they ALLOW him to rule from the grave.
But the truth is this father could NEVER be pleased.
***What I have described is how those with narcissistic and sociopathic tendencies behave because they try to make everyone, even their own children their slave forever and ever.
IF YOU LET THEM, they will use you to do what THEY want you to do even if this is very detrimental to your well being; destroying your confidence, and self-esteem.
They try to force everyone to sell their soul by giving up their own beautiful, unique character, positive ideas and free thoughts and adopt theirs and live the life THEY want you to lead. This is not freedom or independence but slavery. You will never be able to please this father either and he does not care about your individuality; you must follow HIS PARTY LINE.
So, you must stand strong and end this cycle by STOP ALLOWING your father with these characteristics to destroy your positive beliefs, character and values, often ruling you from the grave too.
One SOLUTION is to find a new, worthwhile mission or project AND new worthwhile respectful people to spend your time with. ***DISTANCE yourself physically and also emotionally from your narcissistic and sociopathic father who is always trying to CONTROL YOU and YOUR THOUGHTS.
Let kind, respectful, honest, sincere people into your life and start doing fun things with them. Even have fun, enriching discussions with these new people.
FEEL once again, positive emotions like trust and happiness. Begin to smile and laugh again WITHOUT worrying what your father will think because you have your OWN life to live; like he has his own.
Don’t choose to remain under the control of your father or others who want to control you AND remember THEY WILL NEVER ALLOW YOU TO PLEASE THEM. This is characteristic of those with narcissistic and sociopathic tendencies.
Many classic authors write about this type of person and I have seen this repeatedly in my own life too.
Recognize the TRUTH no matter how painful you think this may be. It is a lot less painful than the life you are leading now trying to please this type of father and you will NEVER succeed.
The TRUTH will set you free so you can BEGIN AGAIN with your new found wisdom. This is called EMOTIONAL MATURITY. Many people are very bright and have intellectual maturity but they lack the emotional maturity to make them a balanced, wise and happy person at peace with themselves. Choose YOUR OWN destination; don’t allow anyone to choose it for you. This is FREEDOM and INDEPENDENCE.
Happy 4th of July.
As always, none of this is legal or any other advice; it is based upon my knowledge and experiences.
-By Sara Hassman, Parental Alienation Solutions, Founder;www.PAlienation .org